Five Confidence Killers and What You Can Do to Ignore Each One

Rarely will you find genuinely confident people. They tend to look focused on their goals and have no time for things that can bring them down. But in reality, many of these confident and booming individuals also used to be insecure nobodies who managed to overcome their insecurities. Every one of us has our confidence killers. How we collect and conquer each one will determine how our confidence will turn out. Here are five examples of things that can bring one’s confidence down and what you can do to ignore them.

Constantly Overthinking

We tend to overthink even the most minor details and revel in different scenarios where we are on the topic of ridicule. Even if you intend to improve yourself, you often do it for the wrong reasons. If you always overthink, you can never be pleased because you will worry about how others will react and what they will think about every decision you make.

Let’s say you have always wanted to improve how you look and feel about yourself. You have found that investing in laser hair removal services will help boost your confidence and eliminate your hair issues. But if you keep overthinking how your loved ones will react to you spending your money on such things, you can think twice and back up at the last minute.

It is time you give up overthinking. Whenever you start to overthink, take a deep breath, look at the bigger picture, and internalize the perks of taking risks. This will help you regain the confidence to make decisions without relying your happiness on others’ opinions.

Playing the Victim

Some people’s confidence issues stem from their trying to blame others for their problems. They try to play the victim every time their decisions and actions contradict their expectations. Maintaining such a mentality will only lead to chronic passivity.

Start being the real captain of your ship. Take the lead and be responsible for your choices. Whatever the consequences may be, be willing to own them up.

The more you take control of your destiny, the more you will learn. This will help you become more confident in making decisions and more responsible. You will be more considerate of other people’s feelings and identify ways to serve you and other people.

Embracing Negativity

Do you constantly find yourself being surrounded by negative people? Are you always willing to stay even if your relationship is now toxic? Or maybe you embrace negativity as your second skin?

Surrounding yourself with negativity can make you feel lonelier, more depressed, and much more stressed. Negative people and situations will suck the life out of you. In the long run, they will have whatever self-esteem they have left.

Start embracing positivity by letting off the negative people in your life. While this is much harder than it looks, you will learn to live and let go of the narrative for your own sake. Stay far away from all the negativity and work on improving your self-confidence instead.

Dwelling in the Past

Let the past stay in the past. There is no point in living in guilt, shame, and negativity. If you continue carrying the burden of your wrong decisions, you will have difficulty picking yourself up.

You may have had so many regrets in the past. But remember that you should never let your history determine your future. Choose to find strength in what you learn and hope you can improve each day.

Try to live in the present and consider what you can do to improve your future. Remember that you can only improve your performance if you surpass your past mistakes and learn to improve yourself. Be bolder, take risks, and free yourself from your past.

Being Harsh to Yourself

When was the last you tried to be kind to yourself? When did you treat yourself just because and even if there is no personal occasion? Have you ever engaged in positive self-talk, or do you only criticize yourself in front of the mirror?

Sometimes, we tend to be so harsh on ourselves. We give our friends words of motivation but never consider doing the same for ourselves. The less kind you are to yourself, the less likely your confidence will grow.

Start embracing self-compassion. Treat yourself with kindness even if you made a mistake, failed to accomplish your goals, or are experiencing a setback. Know that if there is anyone who should be more forgiving to you, that should be you.

These are but five things that can quickly kill your confidence. Don’t let yourself suffer due to your own doing. Be willing to stand up for yourself and embrace change for the better.

Jeremy D. Mena
Alcohol geek. Future teen idol. Web practitioner. Problem solver. Certified bacon guru. Spent 2002-2009 researching plush toys in Miami, FL. Won several awards for exporting tar in Libya. Uniquely-equipped for managing human growth hormone in Libya. Spent a weekend implementing fried chicken on the black market. Spoke at an international conference about working on carnival rides in Miami, FL. Developed several new methods for donating jack-in-the-boxes in Edison, NJ.